...Beauty, cleaning, DIY tips and more - free to join!
   Login   Contact us   Site map   Puzzle Club   Ask a question    Newsletter

Iíve just moved to Paris and Iím having a hard time settling in and making friends. Itís not as easy as I thought:I canít speak French, Iím feeling homesick and have become very negative about France and the French in general. How can I get my bearings and feel more at home?

Answered by: Emma Bird, moving abroad expert

From the brief description you give of your situation, you are showing all classic signs of culture shock. But donít worry, this is normal and most expats go through culture shock to some extent. There are several steps you can take to turn around the situation.

Firstly, try writing a diary and vent your feelings on paper. It may not change your plight, but writing is cathartic and it will help you feel better.

Secondly, make sure you keep fit and active. When youíre in a new place and donít know many people, itís easy to think curling up on your bed with a book and some chocolate is the answer. Itís not. Instead, go for a brisk walk or a jog, join a gym or go swimming and set a routine. Getting regular exercise is good for you and youíll be in a better frame of mind to tackle everything else.

Thirdly, donít make the mistake of thinking you should only mix with the locals. Having a circle of upbeat expat friends means you can talk to people who understand what having the courage to up sticks and move abroad actually involves and they will also be full of helpful hints and tips.

Fourthly, donít beat yourself up over not speaking French fluently. If you take classes or study at home and you make the effort to speak in spite of making mistakes you will get there.

Finally, start exploring the local neighbourhood and adopt a bar or cafť near to your home as your own. Go in every day for a cafť au lait or a glass or vin rouge and it will soon become an extension of your own familiar territory.

Back to Questions in the Moving Abroad Section

Back to Ask the Expert home page